Let's go outback tonight . . .

Kind of sick this week. 26 million people in one city a lot of germs passed around. Couple that with the fact that the Japanese apartment buildings have no insulation in them (if it is 35 degrees outside it is 36 degrees inside) makes for a bad combination. I originally thought that there was just a lot of doctors in Tokyo because here the everyday Japanese wear medical masks outside and on the subway, but apparently it is to keep germs away. Also, there is the added bonus of covering up their teeth. The Japanese are stereotyped as having notoriously bad teeth even rivaling the British- although I haven't seen it. The urban legend is that the Japanese toothpaste does not contain fluoride and that is why there is a little less pearly whites in this city than most cities. (and I should not really comment on this, my teeth are probably are a shade similar to that of the armpit area of a old white undershirt of a man who has been wearing a little too much deodorant.) I may have to invest in some of those masks and maybe some teeth whitening. I had a bad dream that Eli Manning stopped choking in the big games and the Giants are in the Super Bowl. Thankfully, I am in Japan and can just pretend that this never happened. Anyway, went to Harijuku and took some pictures along with other parts of the city- Harijuku is a shopping area where everyone dresses up and there are alot of street performers. It reminded me of Venice Beach a bit -performers were a little more asian, a little less talented, but just as creepy. Overall, it was interesting and cool to see. Since someone asked for pictures, here it is- the all picture version (with some commentary) Kompai!




Apparently, Tommy Lee Jones has moved to Japan stolen Bruce Springsteen's nickname and started a coffee company . . . only if the coen brothers gave him the ending to "No Country for Old Men"- I never felt so unfulfilled as the end or lack of ending to that film. Tommy Lee Jones is everywhere- I once saw his picture 22 times in one day

Beef bowl- becoming my favorite meal-- it is beef, rice and in a bowl and a steal at only 500 yen. Lesson to learn about food in Japan and a quick story: always know what you are eating though. I am probably going to hell for laughing at the story. When someone told me this story I laughed out loud for about two minutes straight and it is actually pretty terrible story. It might be a you "to be there story." Also, in every bad event, I think once everything is Ok, there is no harm about laughing at it (at least that is what I tell myself). Anyway, on our first night we went to the this traditional Japanese restaurant with the school and this girl got really sick to her stomach for like three days. I was asking this guy who was at her table how she got sick and I always just heard it was that she ate something bad. Well, he told me the story that they brought out raw pork and other foods and then you had to the meat put into this boiling pot at the center of the table to cook it. Here she just started to eat the raw pork and thought that it was sushi. She turned this kid while she was eating it and asked if it was ok and he said "sure why not eat it." Meanwhile, I cracked up and was like "she thought the raw pork was sushi!" and slapping my knee-- however, I am just as ignorant and just got lucky enough to sit at a table with people who knew what they were doing.

Asian Elvis- much more talented. I advocate we drop the "asian" prefix and just call this guy "Elvis" and then Elvis Pressley should be referred to as "American Elvis" for now on

Ah, Cameron Diaz -- looking much better here in Japan than in America. I thought her best days were behind her - she is everywhere too -also fourth most popular celebrity behind Tommy Lee Jones, "Elvis" (not "America Elvis") and Michael Jackson

The Supreme Court of Japan . . . oh wait, I missed that trip- Note- if you have ten minutes to be somewhere and your ten minutes away from that place, then you don't have time to sit in Mos Burger and eat. (The burger there is really amazing, but small)Small dogs are all the rage in Japan-- I think they may induce labor and bred these dogs prematurely-- they are tiny -smaller than hamsters.

Bikes, people ride them everywhere. I still can't bring myself to to get one. All bikes in Japan usually have two baskets, a light and a bell . . . what am I talking about I am going to get one tomorrow I have a feeling you will be hearing this group in the US soon -with that group name

I don't fit anywhere in Japan. This is my apartment doorway. Most doorways are mouthlevel and I may be hunchedback when I return or concussed

That about sums up Roppongi-- I would liken it to a mix between times square circa 1990, cancun and Beverly hills all in one

I wandered into a shady alleyway by accident and somehow every place seemed really crazy-- I have no clue what this place is, but the sign makes you want to run the other way. I have a feeling this alley broke the PG/PG-13 rating for this blog.

This store had chucky dolls next to care bears-- a bit disturbingSpeaking of disturbing, this guy was the complete opposite The free hugs guy is not as innovative as I once thought- I see these people everywhere now. I was going to make a sign and join the revolution in front of the Shibuya train station, but now that everyone does this and you can buy these signs at the convenience store- it lost its quiet nobility and respectability

This guy sung U2 for about three hours and I never seen such anything like it. He really thought he was Bono singing at Madison Square Garden and sung his heart out, I give him credit for his conviction-- I really need to videotape this guy. He had it all - the toe tap dance / sway with eyes barely open dance move, the loud voice level, and the ability to smoke a cigarrette and sing at the same time. These guys dressed up as greasers and danced the whole afternoon. They danced twice to Pat Bentar's "heartbreaker" in one half hour-- if that is not rock-n-roll, I don't know what is.What better way of bringing world peace than wearing a horse maskAll the girls dress up as goths in Harajuku and this girl looked right out of a horror movieQuick- get a picture of me-they are dressed all in whiteMore Tommy Lee Jones
The craziest thing is that all of these performers and people dressed up is located out front of this huge, holy shinto shrine in Harajuku. The shrine and small park was really surreal and serene. Japan certainly is an interesting place.

I had enough of Japanese culture for one day, so I figured I would try out some of Australian culture (or at least America's version of Australia) . ."Let's go outback tonight, don't wait until tomorrow. . . "

Why don't you slide

Japanese have hats on people for crossing streets

Giant moving crab on side of a building

I humbly apologize for any gramatical errors or spelling mistakes. I don't have much time to edit and I am in a foreign country- many places to see and much law to study. New posting feature-- if any one posts anything though please no foul language or anything less appropriate than this blog has been.

I came all to Tokyo to see what life is like outside of an Irish pub. Fleeced across Norhteast Philly are endless Irish pubs on every single corner probably alternating with sangwich shops specializing in cheesesteaks that this still impressively in this day and age still remain popular in NE philly even as the rest of the country moves towards healthier fares. (I disagree, but can understand how Philladelphia was voted the fattest and ugliest city- a diet that consists heavily of cheesteaks, pretzels and other high carbohyrdrate and fatty foods doom us right from the start) I live right off of Frankford Ave in Philly and it is probably the largest major street in the country where you won't find a starbucks. NE Philadelphia doesn't do cafe mocha or whole foods. You can't walk down Frankford Ave without seeing Mc-something and O'whateveryoucallit with front door wide open inviting you in with the smell last nights fermented hops still glazing the floor and a wide array of 80's music reminding you of high school dances or a weekend car ride. Many people regiously donate a great portion of their paycheck and the majority of their weekend to these establishments far surpassing the catholic church in popularity and devotion. Tough to see any friends if you are not willing to step into one- alot of the social life in this part of the city really revolves around it. Shamrocks of every shade of green and sometimes faded yellow guide your way down the heartland of the working class part of Philadelphia- somehow I hoped to escape this in Japan. Unfortunately, one of my hangouts has become one of the few Irish pubs in Tokyo. I have been coming here more than I would like because they serve a lot of American foods and they are reasonably priced, everyone speaks English and they play all the American sporting events (I can't miss the NFL playoffs. They allow me to use the internet for free (or at least the price of a pint or coke I guess) and they play a really good variety of music- The wait staff and bartenders know my name so I guess I am back where I started in some respects. So my weekend blogspot is now the hobgoblin. Anyway on to the blog:

Search for a sidekick:

I am a big movie buff and many times I see my life as a film. Every single American movie has told me that when you are in a foriegn country you need to find a sidekick especially one who is from the area you are visting. Indiana Jones would have been dead many times over if he did not have the asian kid to drive him around the city in Shangai. Who cares that the kid was annoying, Indy would have been shot in the beginning in the club in Shanghai, crashed into the side of the mountain with the plane or had his hearty ripped out by the scary chanting guy- not an end I would want during my visit in Japan. While in Okinawa, Daniel San in Karate Kid Part II would never have been able to win all that money by breaking the ice block without the moral support of the girl he met and never would have learned the swinging drum technique that helped him defeat Sato's son at climatic death battle at the end of the film. How much fun would Chris Tucker had in the Rush hour films if Jackie Chan was not there. So the goal has been to find a sidekick, preferrably from this country and not female because my girlfriend may kill me if I hung out with a girl the whole time. Here is a list of some of the criteria in choosing:

1. Knows the lay of the land- can show you little things about the country - like don't eat outside and never leave your chopsticks upright in your food- so as not to offend the people. Oh wait, I already did those things. Well, I am sure that there is a list of other things that I should not do so I will offend any more Japanese. Also, they can show me where I can get a meal for under 10 dollars and a place that I do not have to order three things off the menu besides the beef bowl place. I have become addicted to this beef bowl thing. It is beef over top of rice in a bowl. The usually put raw egg on top, but I stay away from that. The Japanese seem to put raw egg on top of a lot of things. I ordered pasta and it had runny eggs on it. The beef bowl is cheap and really good, but I need a new cheap spot. Everytime I go out to a lot of other restaurants I find myself having to order three things off the menu because the portions in Japan are really small. I have been spending a lot of money on food. Even though teaching is such a lucrative job and I can easily make up the money that I am spending here in Japan;), I would like to find a more frugal ways of eating.

2. Knows some English and Japanese- not too much English because the bond should be unspoken like we know what we are thinking before we do it. Although my Japanese language skills are very slow-developing, my pointing skills have been greatly enhanced. I can accurately point to something over 30 feet away. When the Japanese do not understand what I am saying, i just pull out the right index finger and it is game over. I am then met with some head nods and everything is ok right after my pointing finger goes to work.

3.Knows some martial arts- asia is where the martial arts were born. I always wanted to learn some and American movies have also taught me that at any moment someone can be lurking behind any street corner or dark alley who will want to randomly karate chop me. (Just kidding, the Japanese are really the most polite and well-mannered people. Tokyo is extremely safe. You could probably leave your wallet on the street corner and your money would still be in it when you return. I gave someone too much money at a restaurant and she chased me down on the street to return 20 yen to me-- which is like 19 cents American. Also, the Japanese are extremly law-abiding. It could be four in the morning and a tiny side street with no cars in sight and the Japanese will not jaywalk. They wait for every light. It is a crazy sight and hard to believe as an American)

It has been tough to meet possible sidekick candidates because I spend a lot of time with the other law students and it has been a really frenetic and busy first two weeks in Tokyo. Anyway, here are the candidates:

1. Tommy- my real estate agent who helped me get into my apartment.
Pros- knows city very well, showed me a ton of places and had a great amount of patience- I looked at a ton of places and I am very indecisive generally, great driver but he almost killed me a bunch times. He weaved in and out of traffic- even went the wrong way down a street to show me an apartment, because of that, he has the nickname "Tommy Earnhardt jr," taught himself English and taught me a couple of cool words in Japanese

Cons- works for a shady company, I can never get a hold of them and I am sure that I am not getting back any of my 1300 dollar security depost, he did not like my adverserial approach of finding an apartment, and is from okinawa not the mainland of Japan which he said the Japanese sometimes look down on the people from Okinawa, also does not know martial arts

Takashi- Japanese law student who is graduating from the Temple University in Japan, he studied at Temple in Philly last semester and was alot of fun sitting at our table during the opening dinner in Japan

Pros- showed me alot of cool cultural aspects of Japan and I learned alot from him. He saved me from bringing death upon the table by telling me to put down the chopsticks from my food. He showed me that Japanese are very big into giving one another business cards and if you are ever going to network in Tokyo it is good to have your own business card. He showed me that if school is paying for something, don't be afriad to order more. He also explained to me that it is impolite that if you see someone at your table glass is empty, than you must refilll it. When he was reading the menu to us foriegnors because it was in Japanese, he read out the word whiskey. I told him there was an old saying (you usually see it alot in Irish shops) that "if it wasn't for whiskey, the Irish would rule the world." He quickly responded that "if it wasn't for sake, the Japanese would rule the world" - which was really funny and I had a good laugh at that one.

Cons- I am not sure he knows martial arts and I don't know how well he knows Tokyo

Free Hugs guy
Pros- He is a true innovator- people give him money for holding a sign and giving hugs, he gets some love from thousands of beautiful women a day- how did no one in America think of this idea.
cons--I had to give him a hug to get a photo with him, germs- he is touching a lot of people and could spread a lot of germs, I don't know if he knows any English or knows the martial arts.

Major events this weekend:

Sake tasting- We had a sake tasting event sponsored by school where there was free sake, a bunch of different musical groups and a fashion display. The whole night was a lot of fun, but I found out that I have a really difficult time sometimes being an ignorant American. I ran into my language teacher at a a sake tasting event sponsored by school. I kept calling her Suzuki-san and she kept saying no and I could not understand why because she does not speak English very well and it was really loud in the place. Here a friend that was standing there told me that her name was really Izusu. I feel completely bad about it and will have to apologize for it.

The cross-dressing Japanese dance group, probably most electrifying performance of the night besides the people dressed up as cats who danced to Britney Spears song

Sumo Wrestling- school sponsored a sumo wrestling event. It was a lot of fun and really interesting. It was crazy to see some of these 300 pound guys throwing, pushing, and slapping one another until someone is thrown out of the ring. I don't know much about it but it was really an exciting sport. The matches rarely last over a minute and the matches ran continuously throughout the day. It was odd because the crowd went crazy everytime one of the wrestlers threw the chalk high into the air. I think that it may have meant the wrestlers were mad or the Japanese just really admire chalk tossed in the air. Also, I keep wondering why they wear thongs. It must be really uncomfortable to wear while wrestling and why not just throw some shorts on these guys. I never really thought I would appreciate the fact that the American wrestlers wear spandex, it is definitely less disturbing on the whole. Also, it was a really funny moment, one wrestlers thong started to come undone. They stopped the match and the wrestlers had to stay in the same position while a guy had to come into the ring to fix it. If I ever have another bad day while teaching, I just can be grateful that I am not a thong fixer.

More on toilets: Supposedly the one thing I wrote about before is not called an "arse shower", but supposedly a "bidet". Anyway, I decided to try it out before i left-- not actually use it but just push the button . When I pushed the button, it made the transformer noise. I thought my toilet was turning into optimus prime. I knew that Japanese knew elctronics but not that well. This arm came out into the middle of the toilet and then nothing happened. So of course I do the stupid thing of looking closer and the thing sprayed me in the face and I quickly washed my face and could not stop thinking about whether it was toilet water or not that sprayed. Again, if you ever find yourself near a bidet just run away.

Japanese fashion- everyone dresses really formally here in Japan. You never see someone where sweatpants besides myself (i try to avoid it but I like being comfortable). Tokyo has a lot of high fashion and alot of men were suits and women were skirts. High boots are really popular for the women. The men here also wear shoes with heels sometimes too. One random note, it seems like every young Japanese male has the same haircut as the lead singer of the goo-goo dolls. Everywhere you look, it is like millions of asian johnny resnicks. The song slide has been stuck in my head because of it

Bowing:it is alot of fun bowing, there sometimes I just keep bowing and it is a non-stop cycle. I never know what to do and they keep bowing back and then I bow and they bow and I bow- it is a lot of fun.

Well, I have spent way too much time on this entry. I don't know if anyone had the patience or time to read the next one. And, I have spent 20 dollars sitting here writing. 10 dollars for a pint and 10 dollars for two cokes. Next week, I will try to post more pictures and less words. Cheers.

Lost in Transration

Herro! (the Japanese seem to confuse 'l' with 'r' but who can blame them because so far I confused Konichiwa with every other Japanese word) I have been in Japan now for officially one week and really is has been an exciting and interesting week also wierd and uncomfortable. I feel completely lost here right now, but slowly I am picking up little things. Who knows maybe a month from now I will be able to properly order food at a restaurant. Here are some random thoughts about Japan:

Language: It has been a struggle trying to pick up the culture, customs and language of Japan. When I was traveling through Europe. I had become a master at their language, a chameleon blending in so perfectly that one would never guess that I was not a native European. I used a simple formula. I just changed "I" to a "me" and added vowels to every word and everyone understood me perfectly. So for "I am going to the store" just became "me goinga to stora" and no one knew the difference. Here, there is none of that. It is a completely different language and fewer people speak English than in the European countries. I start my language class tomorrow so hopefully I can learn something besides 'Hello, ' 'thank you,' and 'good morning.'

Customs: I have learned by trial and error how not to offend the Japanese people. I have tried very hard to be polite and courteous, but unfortunately I probably offended the people of Japan once every 2.2 minutes. During this big dinner sponsored by school at a traditional Japanese with many local Japanese students and former members of the program, I decided to use the bathroom in the course of dining. I remembered reading somewhere something about leaving your chopsticks straight up in your food, so I just figured that this must be the polite way to do it. Fortunately, when I got and left my chopsticks straight up, the Japanese guy next to me, Takashi (possible Japanese sidekick candidate - more on this in another posting) quickly stopped me and told me that it means something about death in Japanese society, so I made the mental note never to that again. In Tokyo, the city is incredibly clean even though it is really crowded. However, there are very little trash cans in the city and I was always curious about it. I was informed that no one is supposed to eat anything outside that you are supposed save your food until you get inside. The mystery of why everyone was staring at me on the train and on the streets while I ate my breakfast on the way to school can officially be put to rest. Also, the Japanese people are unbelievably nice and apologetic. I made a mistake trying to buy something at the electronic store and the employee kept bowing and saying he was sorry. I tried to explain to him that I should be sorry- a bit different than Philadelphia where a flesh wound sometimes has to be involved to get an apology.

Bathrooms: I heard stories before I left that Japanese toilets were just a hole in the ground that you had to somehow manage yourself, which made me a little fearful. However, Japanese bathrooms are luxurious. They have heated bathroom sheets and some type of arse shower. Don't ever use the device to the right, it is a bit scary.

TV: Japan TV is unusual but amazingly watchable. I have no clue what they are saying but every show looks interesting, however I certainly miss American TV. I usually flip through every morning when I get up, just to find someone speaking English. I even stomached Hillary Clinton's very sincere crying speech just because it was in English. However, usually this kids show is the only English language program on TV when I get up. It is like Barney but 20 times more disturbing. Instead of Barney, it was a grey colored character who looks like the swamp thing and taught kids Micheal Jackson dances. Wednesday I turned on the TV it was "today is Wednesday, now do the thriller." I woke up to on Thursday it was "Thursday now do the Thriller." Friday, same thing - thriller time. I feel like I am stuck in some weird Japanese version of Groundhog day. Anyway, It seems a bit strange to have Micheal Jackson be the focal point of a kids show.

Cast of Pokimon

Together forever

Space is a premium, everything is much smaller. I can barely fit in my hotel room and it is still more expensive than a nice American one.

Top Ten International Experiences

Just one day before I leave for Japan and I am filled with uncertainty and excitement. I have realized that I never been away from where I grew up, Northeast Philadelpphia, for more than one month in my entire life, which actually may be a bit sad. Even when I was away in college, I still came home to enjoy mom's cooking, raid the cabinents, make my mom do my wash, and ask for money. Even later in life when I worked in New Jersey and lived in NJ for three years, I still made it home to raid my mom's cabinent, make my mom do my wash, and ask for money. This is a big move for me one that will hopefully give me more insight into my life as I approach my 30th year of existence.

I have never been to Japan let alone anywhere in Asia and I realize that it is going to be an interesting experience. First I envision myself being at least a foot taller than anyone. I assume I will be like godzilla knocking buildings, people scurrying down the street running away from me. Although I taught a unit on Japan, I am really curious to see what life will be like. I know fair amount about the history of the country, but really don't know much about what life will be like in the city. Much of what I learned about life in Japan is from American movies, so of course, if I am going to do well in Japan I will have to find a Japanese sidekick to hang out with.

As I leave I can only take with me my the experiences from past international travels and learn from them. I have been to Canada, Mexico, throughout the mainland of Europe, Caribbean islands and this is what I learned:

Top Ten Things I learned from Past International Experiences

10. Never jump into the middle of an ocean if you can't swim- While out on a boat ride with my girlfriend and some American who took us out on his boat a couple miles off the coast of Jamaica. They jumped into the water and swam back to the boat. Then the boat driver said to me, "When else are you going to get a chance to swim in the middle of the ocean." I quickly thought your right, this life ain't no dress rehearsal, I might as well. As I jumped off the side off the boat with no life preserver, I realized I can't really swim well. As I tried to use my below average doggie paddling skills to get back to the boat, a current pick up the boat and the boat moved further and further away from me. I started to panic, flail and take in water and almost drowned. Luckily, the boat driver was accurate at throwing a life preserver and my girlfriend jumped in to help me to the side of the boat- what better way to display your prowess as a man than have your girlfriend jump in and try to save your life. Follow up note, while in the Domincan Republic years later, while on a banana boat, I screamed like a baby the whole time and was deathly afraid of another drowing incident so I managed to hold on the entire time even when the intentionally turned over the boat and I nearly dislocated my shoulder. Ah, can't wait to get back into the water.

9. Even if the "the beach is good," you shouldn't yell it out over and over again - While in Barcelona, Spain, I was so excited to be at the beach after a long train ride and I started to repeatedly yell out "La Playa es bueno" over and over when we stepped foot on the beach and somehow everyone at the beach looked at me like I was crazy. A friend then informed me that imagine you were ona beach in the US and someone started yelling out "the beach is good" repeatedly, you would probably think they should be sent away. I agreed.

8. If something only legal in two countries, then you shouldn't do it. While in Switzerland, a friend and I went Canoning. The brochure looked really interesting- majestic waterfalls, smiling faces and cool wet suits and helmets. Whatever, I was in. Then as we drove up the Alps, I learned more about canoning. Canoning is where you drive up to a high point in the mountains and scale down where the water travels down the mountain. You repel down the sides of waterfalls, cliff dive and rock slide. Apparently, it was only legal in Switzerland and New Zealand and we learned that 15 people had died the year before because there is a high danger of flash flooding. Especially to someone who can't really swim, this experience became particularly terrifying. ( and my friend signed us up for the advanced route, lucky me) It strarted off horrifically and only got worse. I was terrible at repelling. I would was so slow and nervous and the whole group had to wait up for me at every turn. There was a 55 year old guy and a 16 year old girl in our group who even passed me in evertything we did. Then we had to jump off of a wooden 2 by 4 resting on our crazy australian guides lap into a pool of water surrrounded by pointy rocks 30 feet below. Needlesss to say, being long and lanky did not help, because I missed the landing pool slighty and my leg hit the rocks. I had a bruise that was the size of a football and lasted the rest of the summer. Luckily, it started raining and there was a danger of flash flooding, and we just hiked down the rest of the mountain, ending my humilation and utter terror.

7. The French can crush any dream- I had a simple dream. I just wanted to dress in the typical French fashion: a beret and a horizontally stripped shirt, and speak in an unitelligible French accent to embarass my friends and girlfriend while I was in Montreal, Canada. Somehow the French knew my plan and there was a conspiracy against me getting my beret. I walked in every store and no one had one? In the center of French- Canada? Impossible, the French are diabollical. Whether it is ruining a beach experience by wearing a disturbing speedo on the NJ beaches, generally looking down on Americans or the beret conspiracy- the French can crush your easily crush your American dreams.

6. Rob Schneider movies are really funny . . . if you are in Amsterdam. Somehow when I watched Duece Bigalow a second time in the United States, it somehow wasn't that funny as the first time, but I still don't know why.

5. Before you go out in a city, it is a good idea to know the name of the place that you are staying. This seems like a simple rule, but easily overlooked. During my first night in San Sebastion, I became seperated from the people I was traveling with and started hanging out with some Spaniards. I started looking for my friends and could not find them and then realized that I did not know the name of the place I was staying. I proceeded to be lost for the next ten hours, wandering through the city in the pouring rain looking for the place that I was staying and could not find it.

4. If you are lost just yell out "Ayudame Cristo" and good things will happen. Although not really religious, I implored the help of some higher powers while being lost in San Sebastian. After being distraught, tired and thinking that I would never be able to find the group that I was traveling with. A police officer drove me around to every hostile and patiently waited as I asked every front desk, "Am I staying here?" We eventually searched about 20 hostiles until we arrived at the one that I was staying at.

3. Batering is Fun - In batering you win some and you some, but you will certainly have fun haggling over cost. I once bartered bartered someone down to 1 dollar from 20 dollars for two aztec sculpture. I once bought a stress ball in rome for 3 cents (however an hour later it exploded on me and the powder gave me a rash), I once paid 50 dollars for fake cuban cigars that disintegrated when you took the out of the box. Even in Philly just last weekend, I was part of a contigent that was able to barter a mink coat off a stranger for 30 dollars. With batering, you never know what you are going to get but it will be fun.

2. Never stay at someone's place who solicites you at a train station. After taking an overnight train from Rome, we meet Franco right in the middle of the train station. He said he had a place right around the corner from the station and we were really tired so we decided to give it a try. I was even traveling with my friend whose nickname is "Edog" and he grew up in the Eastside projects, so I figured how could we be ripped off. All the signs were there that maybe we should not trust this guy- we meet him at the train station, he had the thin mustache, slicked back hair, and told us right away he had a different girlfriend for every day of the week, but still we stayed with him. He ripped us off and probably stole from us too. He took us on a half hour walk to the worst part of Rome, the room was dirty and he charged us three times that of any other hostile in town. When I asked him to serve as an interpreter because I could not get a hold of my friend's sister who lived in Italy because her Italian boyfriend answered the phone and he spoke no English, Franco screamed at him for five minutes and told me to call back after 7. I found out later that he threatened the boyfriend and said he would do horrible things to him if he did not telll me how I could get a hold of my friend's sister. When it was all over, we still gave gifts when we left. He was a true master of his craft.

1. Never stay in a circus tent when in Germany, even if it only costs four dollars a night. No explanation needed here, just don't do it.

Hopefully, I will have learned from these past experiences. As I leave I will miss probably anyone reading this- family, friends, my sweetie, my soulmate (my cat emma), any students, colleagues or whoever stumples upon this as I go oversees. Upcoming blog items-things do on a airplane for 14 hours, pictures and my search for a Japanese sidekick.